Wedded Bliss... *Sigh*

It's been a year. A full rotation around the Sun since my J and I professed our eternal commitment to one another in front of 150 of our family, friends, and the "plus ones" of those family and friends...

Year one... I would categorize it as a "roller-coaster" of a year. In terms of major life events, we nailed some biggies: we got hitched (150 guests = big hitched), we honeymooned in Hawaii, J got a job in NYC so we contemplated moving from DC to NYC, we decided to move, J went to quit, J was talked out of quitting, so we bought a house instead, renovated its kitchen, lived idyllically in the burbs, rang in my big 3-0, J got a job in SF from the same company that we almost moved for in NYC, J accepted, we both quit our jobs, packed up the house, put the house on the market, and took a one way flight out to San Francisco.

I'm hoping for a less action-packed year 2. But what are the chances of that happening? See, I'm starting to view life in a different perspective... perhaps it's just circular. Let me explain. At some point in your life, when you've left the nest and you started to buy mutual funds and plan for the future, life starts to rotate on its own. And if you ever find yourself saying -- I just want it to get back to normal... it's not going to happen unless Doc Brown flies his dilapitated DeLorean onto your front lawn screaming "88 gigawatts!" and you transport yourself back to when you were wholly dependent on someone else for the major stuff.

What I'm trying to get at is -- you know how you look at your pile of work on your desk, and you aim to knock off a good chunk of it today so that you have less tomorrow? Well, isn't it always the case that tomorrow, the pile will have grown? Life is the same way... it's a self-filling glass of water -- until it's not one day. So I guess I need to just rememeber, full is far better than empty. And normal is nowhere to be found again.

This is just me, mentally preparing for an action-packed year 2. So far, I'm a slave to my computer, looking for a job in a city with thousands of opportunities... and all I need is ONE! J and I have some travel plans here and there, one "life-altering" plan slated for 4Q of this year (yikes!)... and then there are all those unplanned things to fill up the gaps in between. Action-packed it will be. I'll admit, I'm scared.

Fundamentally, there's one thing that grounds me. I love him. And he loves me. And that helps to ease some of my frayed psychosis. I have that... that love thing. We argue -- and man, do I need to blog the things we argue about -- it's funny stuff. We push each other at times. But at the end of the day, we couple up in bed and lock fingers. And that's pretty cool.

Happy Anniversary, sweetheart! Looking forward to #2 and #75, and all the ones in between. Bring it.

The Trials and Tribulations of Obtaining Employment

Finding a job... it's almost like dating. It invokes the same neurotic behavior as those engaged in finding a significant other. I would know... I was once single and dating, and now, I'm desperately trying to make an honorable woman of myself by finding employment.

You see, three weeks ago, my husband and I moved from the East Coast to San Francisco so that he could start his new job. He's a hot shot now... high rise office with a view, dinner meetings with restauranteurs where famous chefs personally prepare his meals, fully stocked company refrigerator filled with every kind of beverage including the very chic Vitamin Water. I come off like I'm irked, but the truth is I'm not competitive with him, and I wholly support his successes. However, his amazing success does make me wonder... what happened to me?

I graduated from a decent university, went on to get a Masters degree -- in a fairly useless field -- but I have a diploma nicely framed to show for it. I worked hard for four years... gaining confidence and promotions along the way. And then, I moved to the East Coast for my man. Uprooted myself from everything I had built, and moved for LOVE. So romantic! The problem? I was so in love, I forgot to plan my life. I just moved across country and relied on love to take care of everything. Well, love doesn't get you a job. Love doesn't advance your career. So I took a job that wasn't much of a career developer.

Two and half years later, I'm back here, in the city that I love, but I'm too unemployed to focus on just how beautiful it is here. Everyday, I scour the web looking for opportunities. I revise the same cover letter over and over again to fit different job descriptions. With each revision, you feel as though you're peeling away every last layer of sincerity and dignity, passionately declaring your interest in positions loaded with business acronyms you don't even understand! But it has to be done! And then I click on "submit" -- the button that sends these carefully crafted documents that spell out your life ambitions into the abyss. Is there someone out there receiving and reviewing? Or is it really just a black hole of hope? So I assume, because I must believe in the system, that there's got to be someone there... but then, the next question becomes: Why haven't they called? And here's where I turn into that insecure little girl at 24 with all those annoying questions that indicate the need for some serious therapy... "Why haven't they called?" "Is it me?" "Did I present myself correctly?" "Did I come off too eager?" "Not eager enough?" "Am I good enough?" "Is it a turn off that my name is spelled with an 'S'?" And on, and on, and on... Don't get me started about what happens after I get an interview...

Anyone out there feel my pain? Would love to commiserate.